Life Lesson Series: It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light. - Aristotle

Life Lesson #12

“It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light.” – Aristotle

The Philosopher Queen vs. The Philosopher King

My mother always told me, everything in the darkness must come to light. She wasn’t speaking about philosophy, but about the lies people tell—both to others and themselves. Big or small, she believed truth would always reveal itself because, as she often said, God would have it no other way.

When I first read Aristotle’s words, I thought of her. The famous philosopher spoke of life’s darkest seasons, urging us to focus on the light—a symbol of better times. The “light” is deeply personal, shaped by our own experiences. No two dark moments are the same, and no two people see the light in exactly the same way.

Skyline Stars and the Light of Day

Life often offers more shadows than sunlight. Even when I thought I was standing in the light, darkness found a way to creep in—like a city skyline glowing faintly but still overshadowed by night.

At times, stars lit my path; other times, clouds swallowed them whole, leaving me lost. Eventually, the sun would rise, but the shadows lingered, waiting for my return.

The Lies I Told Myself

I have known the kind of darkness where you can only put one foot in front of the other, moving forward on faith alone. You stumble, fall, and rise again, fighting against what feels immovable—until one day, light seeps in, filling your eyes, your heart, and your soul.

When I think about my mother’s wisdom and Aristotle’s belief, I see they’re the same truth: every dark moment in my life has been fuelled by the lies I told myself.

After my assault as a teenager, I told myself I wasn’t worth protecting.
When I turned to substances in university to self-medicate my anxiety and early symptoms of Bipolar disorder, I told myself I was being brave—not running away.
When I was diagnosed with Bipolar I disorder, I told myself that denying it meant it wasn’t real. I fought against the current, believing I could never drown.

Darkest Fears Come to Light

The darkest night of my life came one November. After 25 years of substance use, unmanaged mental health, self-deception, and fear, I felt completely spent. I had tried to live positively, to shine the light of my mother and grandmother, but I could no longer escape the darkness inside me—unhealed trauma, deep shame, and fear of both failure and success.

That night, I spoke to God and to myself, admitting how tired I was. I asked for help. In that moment, I felt a small but undeniable light within me—peace, possibility, and the first flicker of healing.

The darkness didn’t vanish overnight, but I carried that light forward, remembering both my mother’s words and Aristotle’s: the lies we tell ourselves must turn into truth before light can break through. During our darkest moments, we must focus on the light ahead—the beacon of better days waiting for us.

Final Reflection

Thank you to my Philosopher Queen—my mother—and the Philosopher King, Aristotle, for teaching me this:
The light at the end of the darkest tunnel is also the light inside of me.

Coping with Bipolar Disorder: Personal Stories of Resilience

By Onika Dainty

Coping with Bipolar disorder can be an overwhelming journey, but sharing personal stories often illuminates the path to understanding and healing. According to the Canadian Alliance on Mental Illness and Mental Health, nearly 1 in 100 Canadians live with Bipolar disorder. This statistic reflects a significant reality that is echoed in the U.S., where around 2.8% of adults are diagnosed with this condition, as reported by the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA). These numbers may vary, but the shared experiences of individuals facing this disorder create a common thread of resilience.

Building a Support System

Empowering oneself through community support is crucial when managing Bipolar disorder. Locally, Durham Mental Health Services (DMHS) provides invaluable resources, including peer support and educational programs tailored to individuals in my area. These services foster an environment where individuals can connect, share, and heal together. Additionally, the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH) serves as a vital resource for all Canadians, offering comprehensive services that address mental health challenges, including Bipolar disorder.

When seeking support, it’s important to remember that not all groups are beneficial for everyone; some can even be triggering. Finding a support system that resonates with you is vital. Whether it’s a formal group, a trusted friend, or an online community, ensure that the space you choose promotes healing rather than causing distress.

Building a support system doesn’t just mean seeking professional help; it also involves finding a community that understands what you’re going through. When I first began to understand my own diagnosis, I sought out support groups in my area. One of the first groups I ever participated in was centered around Bipolar disorder. Hearing others share their experiences made me realize I wasn’t alone in my struggles and provided me with practical coping strategies I hadn’t considered.

Personal Stories of Resilience

Everyone's journey with Bipolar Disorder is unique, filled with both triumphs and setbacks. I want to share a bit about my own story. From 2004 to 2024, I experienced 13 manic episodes that required hospitalization. One of the most challenging times was spending 3.5 months at Ontario Shores after my last episode. I even faced homelessness, living in a shelter during that difficult period. But despite all those setbacks, I’m here today to help others by sharing my lived experience.

In addition to my journey, I spoke with a remarkable woman on a podcast five years ago who dealt with being misdiagnosed initially. She later discovered that she was living with Bipolar Disorder, all while navigating the complexities of being a mother and wife. Her story highlights the struggles many face in balancing familial responsibilities with mental health challenges. It was inspiring to hear how she found ways to manage her condition while still being there for her family.

Lastly, I have been attending a community-focused mental health event on and off for the last two years. At one of these gatherings, I met individuals from various backgrounds sharing their experiences. Hearing the stories of other women was empowering. It was inspiring to see how a community can bridge gaps and foster understanding, regardless of age, race, or socioeconomic background. These stories remind us that we are not alone in our struggles, and together we can create a supportive environment for healing and growth.

Practical Coping Strategies

Developing effective coping strategies is essential for managing Bipolar disorder. Here are some practical tips that have helped me and others navigate our mental health journey:

Establish a Routine: Creating a daily routine can provide structure and stability. It helps regulate sleep patterns, which is crucial for mood management.
Practice Mindfulness: Techniques such as meditation, deep breathing, and yoga can help ground you during intense emotional periods. Mindfulness practices have been shown to reduce anxiety and improve overall well-being.
Stay Active: Physical activity is beneficial for mental health. Regular exercise can reduce stress and improve mood, making it a vital part of a self-care routine.
Limit Triggers: Identify situations, environments, or people that trigger your symptoms. Finding ways to minimize these triggers can prevent episodes and enhance your emotional stability.
Stay Connected: Maintain open lines of communication with trusted friends, family members, or mental health professionals. Sharing your feelings and experiences can alleviate feelings of isolation.
Educate Yourself: Knowledge is empowering. Understanding your condition helps you recognize signs of mood changes and equips you with strategies to cope.

The Importance of Awareness and Education

Raising awareness about Bipolar disorder is crucial. Many people still carry misconceptions about mental health conditions, which can contribute to stigma and isolation. In Canada, Durham Mental Health Services (DMHS) provides local outpatient resources that help educate both individuals and families about mental health challenges, including Bipolar disorder.

The Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance (DBSA) offers a wealth of information on their website, serving as a resource for those seeking to understand Bipolar disorder better. However, I want to emphasize the importance of focusing on Canadian options, like DMHS and the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health (CAMH), which provide specialized resources and support for those in our communities.

During my travels, I encountered people who were surprisingly knowledgeable about mental health, which made me reflect on the importance of fostering similar conversations back home in Canada. Education and understanding can empower communities to offer the right kind of support to those in need.

Final Thoughts

Coping with Bipolar disorder is undoubtedly a challenging experience, but it’s also one filled with potential for resilience and growth. Sharing our lived experience stories can foster understanding and connection among individuals facing similar battles. I encourage you to seek support, whether through local services like DMHS or through national organizations such as CAMH or DBSA.

For those looking to take the first steps toward managing their condition, I highly recommend checking out my previous post How to Start Managing Bipolar Disorder: A Comprehensive Guide for practical advice and insights. Remember, your story matters, and by sharing it, you contribute to a community that thrives on empathy and support.

Let’s continue to have conversations that take us beyond the stigma surrounding mental health. Each story shared can serve as a beacon of hope for someone else navigating their own journey with Bipolar disorder. You are not alone, and together, we can create a compassionate and understanding community.

Onika L. Dainty

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Saturday, August 9, 2025

Life Lessons Series: It is during our darkest moments that we must focus to see the light. - Aristotle